


Fury's Bitches

by mcustancm



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Abbie keener - Freeform, Author Is Sleep Deprived, COMPLETE!, Cannon?, Chaos, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Clint Barton is Good with Kids, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Let's make it one., M/M, Multi, Peter Parker & Shuri Friendship, Smh it took me a long time to come up with that tag, Stark Kids vs Barton Kids, Texting, This Is STUPID, Tony Stark is Good With Kids, Who is she?, groupchats, never heard of her, thats not a tag?, the guardians show up at one point, this is a mess btw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-23
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-09-25 00:43:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 5,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20367829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcustancm/pseuds/mcustancm
Summary: Peter Parker makes a group chat with the Avengers. And no one is allowed to leave.AkaI'm bad at summaries.This is hella chaotic tho so... yeah.TEXTING FIC





	1. Fury's Bitches part one

**Author's Note:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pietro Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; Lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child.
> 
> EVERYONE IS IN THE SAME TIME ZONE CAUSE IM TOO FUCKING LAZY TO DO MATH RIGHT NOW. 
> 
> Kudos and comments appreciated
> 
> Enjoy!

EVERYONE IS IN THE SAME TIME ZONE CAUSE IM TOO FUCKING LAZY TO DO MATH RIGHT NOW. 

Peter Parker made a group chat

Peter Parker added: Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, James Rhodes, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff, Thor, Bruce Banner, Scott Lang, Hope Van Dyne, Sam Wilson, Stephen Strange, Clint Barton, Shuri, T’challa, Vision, Carol Danvers, Valkyrie, Pietro Maximoff, Loki 

Peter Parker renamed the chat to Fury’s bitches. 

Peter Parker renamed: Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pietro Maximoff to Quick little bastard; 

  
  


Baby spider made the chat not able to be deleted.

Baby spider made the chat not able to leave

Baby spider made the chat that only they can change names

Baby spider: @stephenstrange that's cause I know u will leave and will change your name.

Mr. Dr.: Ok, what is this Parker?

Baby spider: I think we should have a group chat.

He froze: ok… well, why is my name he froze?

Meme queen: cause, you froze

Baby spider: Shuri told me!

He froze: fuck u

Capsicle: language

Cold solder: lAnGuAgE

Sabrina the teenage bitch: lAnGuAgE

Quick little bastard: lAnGuAgE

The first gay: lAnGuAgE

Mommy spider: lAnGuAgE

Antboy’s mom: lAnGuAgE

He froze: lAnGuAgE

Antboy: lAnGuAgE (sorry Mr. captain sir)

Baby spider: lAnGuAgE

Spider’s mom: lAnGuAgE

Android: lAnGuAgE, sir. 

Queen of snek: lAnGuAgE

Mr. Dr.: lAnGuAgE

Hammer dude: lAnGuAgE

Thor’s daddy: lAnGuAgE 

Bird boy 2.0: lAnGuAgE

Retired: lAnGuAgE

Tony stank: lAnGuAgE

Bell peppers lAnGuAgE 

Grayboy: lAnGuAgE

Meme queen: lAnGuAgE

Baby spider: oh this is gonna be fun

Meme queen: yes, much fun

Tony stank: Pete, I'm replacing you with Harley. 

Baby spider: i- he can't I'M THE ONLY SPIDER.

Mommy spider: false

Baby spider: sorry mom number 1

Spider’s mom: I was about to attack. But we good now

Baby spider added Harley Keener to the chat

Baby spider changed Harley Keener’s name to Yee Haw boy

Yee Haw boy: thank u love of my life.

Baby spider: kisses from across the hall. 

Queen of snek: brother, ur hulk is bothering me.

Thor’s daddy: eXSCUSE ME?

Hammer dude: get used to it 

Bird boy 2.0 shots fucking fired.

Capsicle: language

Cold solder: that's all he’s gonna say in here.

Retired: I retire for what? 5 minutes and it all goes to shit? OH AND THEN I GO ON HOUSE ARREST?

Antboy: same, brethren

Antboy’s mom: I'm breaking up with u if u say brethren again.

Antboy deleted a message. 

Quick little bastard: yo hawkeye. Remeber when i almsot died?

Sabrina the teenage bitch: can you spell?

Quick little bastard: no

Retired: yeah, but I agree with the witch. Can you spell?

Grayboy: I was there, I remember. 

Bell peppers: You all realize it’s 3 in the morning? Why are you all up?

Yee Haw boy: why are YOU awake pepper?

Bell peppers: fair point. 

Grayboy: your husband doesn’t sleep. 

Baby spider: factsssss

Meme queen: that's the tea sisters

Yee Haw boy: gotta sip up that knowledge

Android: I am unaware of this new use of words. Mr. Stark?

Tony Stank: don’t even ask me.

He froze: okay, I'm busy being king. I'm muting this and going to sleep. 

Yee Haw boy: yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Baby spider: hawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Antboy: What if the g in Gif is silent?

Bird boy 2.0: go to sleep

Antboy: what gif i don't want to?

Meme queen: THE ANT IS PART OF US @harleykeener @peterparker

Yee Haw boy: aye 

Baby spider: ueueeuhoewhscochifwdioewvifocoes

Tony stank: wtf happened to you?

Baby spider: I’m dropping out

Quick little bastard: same.

Sabrina the teenage bitch: same

Yee Haw boy: same

Retired: okay nope. Pietro and Wanda are not allowed to drop out I am paying for you twos colleges. 

Quick little bastard: damnit. I dind’t want to go to class. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: FUCKING SPELL

Capsicle: language. 

Cold solder: stfu 

Bird boy 2.0: exactly. 

Cold solder: baby bird

Bird boy 2.0: don't call me that

Cold solder: chicken of my heart. 

Bird boy 2.0: no

Cold solder: apple of my dick

Capsicle: CAN YOU TWO NOT?

Bird boy 2.0: ur mad cause I swooped bucky before you knew you were a bisexual captain.

Capsicle: he’s not wrong.

Meme queen: anna oop-

Baby spider: I don't feel safe, it’s time to add someone to the chat

Baby spider added May Parker to the chat.

Baby spider renamed May Parker to Spider’s aunt

Spider’s aunt: peter i’m at work. 

Baby spider: but may, the avengers are scaring me. 

Spider’s aunt: who is spider’s mom?

Spider’s mom: hi. I'm Carol Danvers. Protector of the galaxy. 

Hammer dude: my dear friend rabbit would disagree

Spider’s mom: fuck rocket

Spider’s aunt: I don't have time for this, peter kick me, please. 

Baby spider kicked Spider’s aunt from the chat

Yee Haw boy: oh that was my favorite adult here. :(

Tony stank: EXCUSE ME?

Bell peppers: excuse you, Harley. 

Yee Haw boy: oh I apologize. 

Tony stank: good.

Baby spider: oof. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me if I missed your favorite character! (not doing guardians rn sorry) 
> 
> Suggestions? DM me! @holland.simpkins on Instagram


	2. Fury's bitches part two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chaos

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeet
> 
> Kudos and comments appreciated.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pierto Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child.

CHAT

Fury’s Bitches 

Baby spider: so I’m at school with Harley right?

Tony stank: it’s too early for this. 

Baby spider: shh I’m telling a story. 

Yee Haw boy: PUHIERHREHIIDUHSIWQ NO DONT TELL IT

Mommy spider: Harley what did u do?

Yee Haw boy: I will honestly break up with you peter if you share it.

Baby spider: I’ll take my chances

Grayboy: I'm curious

Android: same

Baby spider: Harley. I love you but this needs to be shared.

Bell peppers: aren’t you boys in school?

Tony stank: oh shit she’s right. It’s our week with Peter and we must be responsible or may won’t let you stay with us anymore.

Mr. Dr. : this is a whole other level of ‘divorced child’ 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: okay i was kinda in class, wtf is going on?

Baby spider: okay so harley and his dumbass made a bet with the teacher and said, “Alright, if I get this math problem right, I get an A on the next two assignments.” Fine right? ONCE SHE AGREED HE SAID “ no wait, make it harder” DUMBASS 

Yee Haw boy: consider yourself single. 

Baby spider: never, you love me too much. 

Yee Haw boy: you’re right

Quick little bastard: guys, soome girl assked for my nummber!

Cold solder: give it to her

Retired: no. no no

Sabrina the teenage bitch: get it

Retired: nope, my son will not date

Sabrina the teenage bitch: I'm dating vision

Retired: he’s a robot

Quick little bastard: y’know lila has a boyfreind? Right? Also.. im 21. She just truned 16.

Sabrina the teenage bitch: I will literally disown you as my brother if you don’t spell correctly.

Antboy: yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo can I add my child?

Baby spider: yeah hold up imma add cassie and the barton kids

Baby spider added Cassie Lang, Lila Barton, and Cooper Barton to the chat

Baby Spider renamed Cassie Lang to Antboy’s child; Cooper Barton to Retired’s son; Lila Barton to Hawk’s favorite.

Antboy’s child: wassup fuxkers

Antboy: Cassie!

Antboy’s child: oh sheet. This isn't our private chat, is it?

Yee Haw boy: there's a private chat w/o me?

Hawk’s favorite: CASSIE! That was a secret!

Retired’s son: dumbass

Capsicle: language

Antboy’s mom: Oh no.. scott? Where's the cat?

Antboy: idk Hope

Antboy's child: really dad?

Grayboy: on a scale from one to ten, how good are my stories?

Bird boy 2.0: triangle 

Grayboy: thank you for the input whore.

Capsicle: language

Tony stank: can I leave?

Bell peppers: same

Mr. Dr.: same?

Baby spider:: hahahahahahahahahahaha no. 

Thor’s daddy: i-

Meme queen: who taught him that?

Queen of snek: me… duh.

Meme queen: WHAT??????????

Baby spider: hold the fucking phone Loki, I thought you that first. 

Capsicle: language. My lord. 

Cold solder: stfu Cap. 

Queen of snek: your point, spiderling?

Hammer dude: ?

Thor’s daddy: babe, mute the chat. Let's go on a date.

Hammer dude: don't have to tell me twice, sweetheart. Meet you outside in two. 

Bird Boy 2.0: why cant you be nice to like this, buck?

Cold solder: stfu. Im very nice to you. 

Mommy spider: no you’re not. 

Android: my calculations agree with the Black Widow. 

Quick little bastard: she texted me. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: finally, a correct sentence. 

Quick little bastard: shut 

Quick little bastard: up

Quick little bastard: whore.

Capsicle: language. 

Retired: cap! Shut the fuck up!

Spider’s mom: can y’all not? I’m on a date with the love of my life. 

The first gay: thats me hoes. 

Spider’s mom: i love you

The first gay: i love you more

Android: peter and Harley are making out on the couch. 

Android sent a video.

Yee Haw boy: rude, leave us alone. WE SEE YOU VIZ

Baby spider: lol vision ran

Meme queen: skirt


	3. Fury's Bitches part three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pierto Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child.
> 
> yeet
> 
> Insta:  
@holland.simpkins
> 
> Comments and kudos appreciated <3
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> (sorry its short today, i was busy)

CHAT

Fury’s Bitches

Bird boy 2.0: HELP ME BUCKY IS CHASING ME WITH A METAL SPOON

Bird boy 2.0 sent a video

Mommy spider: tough. 

The first gay: well what did you do?

Bird boy 2.0: i slapped his ass while he was cooking in the kitchen. 

Tony stank: i wanna leave this chat so badly

Baby spider: too bad, dad

Tony stank: 

Tony stank: you said, dad. Do you think of me as a father figure?

Baby spider deleted a chat

Baby spider: no

Yee Haw boy: YES YES HE MOST DEFINITELY DOES. 

Meme queen: he does. 

Baby spider: really guys?

Grayboy: oh lord tony adopted another kid. 

Tony stank: I literally just have one kid, and it’s Morgan.

Mommy spider: false.

Sabrina the teenage bitch: false

Cold solder: false

Yee Haw boy: that's false

Bird Boy 2.0: CAN WE GET BACK TO ME!?!?!?!?!!?!?!? MY BOYFRIEND IS CHASING ME WITH A FUCKING SPOON. It'S A BIG SPOON. IDK WHERE HE GOT IT.

Spider’s mom: run bitch

Capsicle: language

Mr Dr.: shouldn't have slapped his ass.

Retired: THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE! ESPECIALLY MY CHILDREN

Hawk’s favorite: Hi dad. 

Antboy’s mom: the children are all over the age of 15, they’re fine 

Antboy: MUST PROTECT MY CHILD’S LIFE

Antboy’s child: I'm fine

Retired’s son: MY EYES

Retired’s son: jk.

Quick little bastard: THE GIRL TEXXTED ME

Sabrina the teenage bitch: cool :/

Quick little bastard: hoe

Sabrina the teenage bitch: whore

Capsicle: language.

Hammer dude: Captain... Stop

Capsicle: no

Thor’s daddy: please?

Capsicle: no

He froze: pls?

Capsicle: no

Queen of snek: for once I agree with my brother. Please, captain, stop.

Capsicle: no. You guys need to stop cursing. 

Baby spider: WHY

Spider’s mom: WHY 

Grayboy: WHY

Android: Some people are at the door, they are asking for Thor. and the guy in the Iron can. Just letting you know. 

Tony stank: Who?

Android: They call themselves the Guardians, sir. 

Baby spider: YES YES YES YES YES!

Yee Haw boy: who?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aye guardians next chapter
> 
> Missing your favored character? Tell me!  
Suggestions? DM me! @holland.simpkins


	4. Fury's bitches part four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CHAOS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pietro Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna.
> 
> Enjoy!

CHAT

Fury’s bitches

Baby spider added Peter Quill, Gamora, Nebula, Groot, Rocket. Drax the Destroyer, and Mantis to the chat. 

Baby spider renamed Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna.

Antenna: I feel extreme joy.

Bitch: through what? The fucking phone?

Capsicle: Language

Antenna: No, through the door. 

Baby spider: thats me, i'm the one with joy.

Other peter: why is my name other peter?

Baby spider: cause, I'm the best peter

Other peter: weren’t you kicked out of the MCU?

Baby spider: what's the MCU?

Other peter: never mind. 

I am tree: i… Am Groot. 

Bitch: Yeah, can we come inside?

Tony stank: no

Thor’s daddy: Why?

Green goddess: Quill broke our ship and we have nowhere on this planet to stay, The rodent said he knew you guys. 

Bitch: hey!

Queen of snek: I say let the chaos animals say.

Retired: why would we listen to you? You almost killed all of us back in 2012! There is no way in hell that we are gonna listen to Loki

Queen of snek: bitch?

Hawk’s favorite: I LOOK LIKE I'M FRESH OFF THE RUNWAY 

Antboy’s child: skskskskskskskskssk Lila!

Yee Haw boy: oh…

Baby spider: oh no...

Antboy: my poor daughter...

Retired’s son: someone save cassie

Antboy’s mom: for 5 cents a day, you could help a poor vsco girl like my boyfriend’s daughter. 

Antboy: HOPE THAT WAS A GOOD ONE.

Antboy’s mom: thank you. 

Hammer dude: I'm lost

Tony stank: welcome to my world bitch. 

Capsicle: La-sunabifdsf9iasrhuiofiosfiodfijodfsgiodfgsiodf

Grayboy: The hell?

Bird boy 2.0 I saw him typing language and I yelled “not today.” and took his phone. HE CHASING ME

Just drax: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Stark’s favorite: he tends to do that. Don’t worry, I will kill him if need be. 

Queen of snek: I like this one

Thor’s daddy: LOKI NO. 

Hammer dude: Loki absolutely not!

Tony stank: pepper…. It's 2012 all over again.

Bell peppers: why am I here?

Baby Spider: Because I said so. 

Spider’s mom: ha

Mommy spider: Ha

Baby spider: I HAVE THREE MOMS

Yee Haw boy: and Tony as a dad.

Baby spider: stfu harley. 

Yee Haw boy: Make me.

Hawk’s favorite: STOP FLIRTING

Quick little bastard: pleease

Baby spider: spell first

Sabrina the teenage bitch: I'm disowning you Pietro

Quick little bastard: finee, i’ll taek my Bi ass soomewere else.

Baby spider: mood

Bird Boy 2.0: mood

Cold solder: mood

Capsicle: mood.

Yee Haw boy: mood

The first gay: mood

Spider’s mom: mood

Mommy spider: mood

I am tree: I am Groot. 

Favorite stark: mood

Retired: HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE! CAP SAID SOMETHING OTHER THAN LANGUAGE.

Capsicle; fuck.

Bitch: EXCUSE YOU?

Tony stank: EXCUSE YOU?

Yee Haw boy: LANGUAGE SIR

Android: I am disgusted, aren’t you Wanda?

Sabrina the teenage bitch: I am far beyond disgusted

Other peter: cool, but we’re still outside. 

Meme queen: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHSHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

Baby spider: damn shuri

Green goddess: can we come inside.

Tony stank: no

Hammer dude: sure

Tony stank: fuck you

Hammer dude: do it already pussy. 

Thor’s Daddy: Uh no, that's mine. BACK OFF.

Tony stank: lol.

Retired’s son: wtf is going on?

He froze: oh shit. I just realized I had all of you muted. 

Just drax: finally, cool air. 

Antenna: Yes, cold. I feel happy. 

Mr. Dr.: what did I miss?

Tony stank: the aliens moved in.

Mr. Dr.: fuck. 

Other peter: rude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Missing your fav character? Tell me!
> 
> Suggestions? DM me! @holland.simpkins


	5. Fury's Bitches part five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yeet hi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pietro Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna.
> 
> Enjoy!

CHAT

Fury’s bitches

Sabrina the teenage bitch: Anyone know where my hairbrush is

Android: I believe you left in the bathroom, darling. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: it’s not there anymore

Quick little bastard: uhhh

Sabrina the teenage bitch: PIETRO IMMA FUCKING KILL YOU.

Quick little bastard: WIAT WANDA WIAT! LET ME EXXPLAIN! THE ROODENT TOOKE IT, I SAW HIM LAVE YOUR BATHROOOM. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Queen of snek: good one rabbit. 

Thor’s daddy: oh no

Hammer dude: ONLY I CAN CALL THE RABBIT, RABBIT

Queen of snek: says who

Hammer dude: SAYS ME, LOKI!

Baby spider: welcome back to sibling rivalry. The next showcase we have for you is the green bitch and the blue bitch. 

Green goddess: NEBULA

Baby spider: told ya. 

Favorite stark: what

Green goddess: where are my knives?

Grayboy: what?

Favorite stark: why would I know?

Hawk’s favorite: I'm scared. 

Retired’s son: same.

Baby Spider: finally, siblings that get along. 

Retired: lies, they don’t get along. 

Hawk’s favorite: rude

Mr. Dr.: My sister died… so…

Tony stank: jesus doc

Bell peppers: I'm sorry for your loss, Doc. 

Mr. Dr.: thanks, Pepper.

Green goddess: where are my knives?

Favorite stark: how

Favorite stark: would

Favorite stark: I

Favorite stark: know?

Green Goddess: i saw you with them.

Yee Haw boy: can y’all keep your family quarreling out of here?

Mommy spider: agreed

The first gay: thanks, Harley. That needed to be said.

Yee Haw boy: no problem. Val.

Spider’s mom: when did this friendship occur?

Baby spider: yes, I'm intrigued. 

Yee Haw boy: Y’all were on a mission and Val and I were at the tower.

Baby spider: I can’t believe I date someone who unironically says “Y’all”

Yee Haw boy: I know you love me sugar. 

Baby spider: I do :)

Hawk’s favorite: STOP FLIRTING PLS.

He froze: I beg of you. 

Cold solder: Anyone know where Steve is?

Bird boy 2.0: Why are you looking for him, babe.

Cold solder: I need to go over something from a mission we had. 

Meme queen: Anna oop- this is gonna turn into a fight.

Bird boy 2.0: WHEN WAS THIS MISSION. 

Mr. Dr.: Oh no…

Green goddess: NEBULA

Favorite stark: WHAT YOU FUCKING WHORE.

Capsicle: I don't think I have this right anymore but, Language. 

Antboy’s mom: no u don't

Antboy: You have the right to anything, Sir!

Capsicle: thank you scott.

Antboy: no problem captain America

Android: Harley and Peter are making out in the kitchen.

Yee Haw boy: Damnit Vision. 

Green goddess: where are my knives

Bitch: i HAVE THEM, YOU HAPPY?

Green goddess: you rodent. Give them back. 

Antenna: he said no.

Just drax: uh oh. She’s gonna kill you rocket. 

Hammer dude: no dont kill my rabbit.

I am tree: i am groot

Other peter: I don't even know what to say. 

Antboy’s child: then why did you talk?

Thor’s daddy: we all need therapy.

Tony stank: good idea, doc.

Mr. Dr.: I thought i was doc :(

Tony stank: stfu strange

Mr. Dr.: oh. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggestions? DM on insta! @holland.simpkins


	6. Fury's bitches part six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yeet. "wanna fuck each other,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pietro Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna.
> 
> Insta:  
@holland.simpkins 
> 
> ENJOY

CHAT

Fury’s bitches

Grayboy: alright were the FUCK are the grapes?

Yee Haw boy: that's a fucking mood. 

Android: I believe they are in the refrigerator.

Sabrina the teenage bitch: Love, you’re wrong. I have them. 

Grayboy: Fucker. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: come get them if you want them, Rhodey.

Grayboy: where the hell are you.

Quick little bastard: she is upsttairs. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: WHORE. I WANTED THESE GRAPES. 

Mommy spider: is this all about grapes?

Green goddess: Yes, it’s all about grapes

Queen of snek: valid argument. 

Hammer dude: why loki.

Queen of snek: grapes are good. Wait. Are they green or purple?

Sabrina the teenage bitch: green. 

Queen of snek: that's the good type. 

Baby spider: mom?

Spider’s mom: yes?

Mommy spider: yes?

Bell peppers: yes?

Tony stank: wtf… Pepper?

Bell pepper: Can we adopt peter?

Mommy spider: no

Spider’s mom: No, he’s mine. 

Mommy spider: Excuse me carol?

The first gay: yes, lets adopt peter.

Capsicle: Peter, what in.. why? 

Baby spider: haha told ya i had three moms. 

Hawk’s favorite: umm... 

Retired’s son: What did you do?

Retired: what did you do?

Hawk’s favorite: IT WAS CASSIE. 

Antboy’s child: lies, you like it ;)

Hawk’s favorite: CASSIE LANG! 

Andboy: what did you two do?

Hawk’s favorite: We.. uh

Favorite stark: They were making out on the couch.

Hawk’s favorite: NEBULA!

Antboy’s mom: I knew cassie was Lesbian, 

Antboy’s child: Correction: Bisexual.

Baby spider: welcome to the club. 

Retired: hold up. My daughter is lgbt?

Hawk’s favorite: oh im deffiently gay, like imma smash only girls. 

Retired: ?

Hawk’s favorite: CASSIE TOOK MY PHONE. But yeah im lesbian. Like i’ve only liked girls, dad. 

Retired’s son: we been knew. 

Retired: excuse me? I didn’t. 

Hawk’s favorite: now you do. 

Retired: just get my a grandkid, that all i ask. 

Hawk’s favorite: Cassie, who we adopting

Yee Haw boy: ME ADOPT ME PLS!

Antboy’s child: bet. 

Meme queen: oh shit, i didn’t even notice

Baby spider: hi shuri

Meme queen: hi

He froze: hi shuri

Meme queen: stfu brother. 

Queen of snek: lmao. 

Other peter: gamora. I have a surprise.

Green goddess: otw.

Other peter: NO ONE COME IN OUR ROOM

Antenna: oh no. 

Bitch: oh no

Capsicle: oh no. 

Just drax: oh no

I am tree: i am groot

Mr. Dr.: imma walk in there with my portals.

Other peter: NO!

Mr. Dr.: why?

Other peter: cause 

Green goddess: STRANGE NO!

Mr. Dr.: fine.

Hammer dude: chaos… a thread.

Capsicle: where are buck and sam?

Android: fucking in their room.

Sabrina the teenage bitch: WHY DO YOU KNOW THAT.

Android: i know everything

Thor’s daddy: wanna fuck thor?

Hammer dude: sure

Yee Haw boy: huh… Peter?

Tony stank: DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.

Baby spider: yes babe?

Yee Haw boy: wanna fuck?

Baby spider: my room, five minutes.

Tony stank: Pep? Nat? Carol? Assistance?

The first gay: carol and I are busy. Leave a message.

Bell pepper: they are 17. Let them live. 

Mommy spider: i agree. 

Tony stank: pep?

Bell pepper: 3 minutes, you get the special stuff. Nebs, watch morgan. 

Favorite stark: Have fun! :)

Capsicle: WHO WHY? WHY IS EVERYONE IN THIS TOWER HAVING SEX NOW?

Mommy spider: cap?

Capsicle: fuck it, sure. 


	7. Fury's bitches part seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abbie Keener is here, finally! I've planned to add her since the begging and I kinda just threw her in in this chapter. BUT I ALWAYS WANTED HER HERE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pierto Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna; Abbie Keener to Yee Haw girl.
> 
> Insta!: @holland.simpkins
> 
> Enjoy!

CHAT

Fury’s Bitches

Bell peppers: Anyone seen morgan?

Yee Haw boy: um

Meme queen: uh..

Baby spider: umm….

Meme queen: ,,, uh

Favorite stark: I have nothing to do with this… uh

Antboy’s child:...

Hawk’s favorite: We didn’t kidnap her and take her for ice cream.

Retired’s son: DUDE LILA SHH

Tony stank: if nebula is with them I know she’s safe.

Favorite stark: Tony, they bought her five scoops.

Tony stank: as I said, she’s safe. 

Mr. Dr.: don't believe it tony. 

Grayboy: She’s not safe with the teens

Yee Haw boy: excuse me! She is very safe with us!

Green goddess: I trust the teens, not nebula. 

Favorite stark: bitch.

Baby spider added Abbie Keener to the chat

Baby spider renamed Abbie Keener to Yee Haw girl.

Yee Haw boy: fuck…

Yee Haw girl: hahaha what's up bitches

Yee Haw boy: you are literally 14.

Yee Haw girl: what's your point.

Tony stank: oh no, they multiplied. 

Baby spider: now you have 5 kids, Mr. stark. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: Literally clint has had five kids for years. He basically adopted us,

Quick little bastard: thansk clint.

Bell peppers: are all of you together?

Retired’s son: It’s me, lila, cassie, harley, abbie, peter, nebula, shuri and morgan. 

Meme queen: oop-

Yee Haw girl: I’ve literally lived in the tower for weeks and I'm just now a stark kid? I’m offended. 

Yee Haw boy: be offended. 

Yee Haw girl: why’d it take so long for me to join the chat :(

Yee Haw boy: I told Peter not to let you join. 

Yee Haw girl: Bitch.

Grayboy: Great, how many sets of siblings we got here now?

Android: Well, there is Loki and Thor, Gamora and Nebula, Pietro and Wanda, Abbie and Harley, and Lila and Cooper. 

Cold solder: great… more sibling rivalry.

Bird boy 2.0: just what we needed…

Hammer dude: I just wish my sibling wasn’t always trying to kill me.

Green goddess: same

Yee Haw boy: same @abbiekeener

Yee Haw girl: stfu Harley, We both know i’m better than you. 

Baby spider: Sorry babe, I have to agree with the younger keener.

Yee Haw boy: consider yourself single.

Baby spider: :( im sorry

Yee Haw boy: I forgive you.

Baby spider: yay. 

Bell peppers: aren’t you all together. Just have a normal conversation. 

Retired’s son: We just got back like five seconds ago. IDEK where Lila went. Or any of them. We kinda split up when we came back inside.

Tony stank: well where’s morgan?

Mommy spider: i have her, she’s with Val, Carol, Pietro, Vision, Wanda, Lila, Cassie, Cap and I in the living room. 

Bell peppers: oh okay good. 

Retired: Where are you, cooper?

Retired’s son: my room.

Retired: oh

The first gay: stop spamming my phone. We’re watching a movie in here. 

Meme queen: Is Steve and nat dating yet?

Antboy’s child: lmao yet

Capsicle:...

Mommy spider:...

Hawk’s favorite: yes YES THEY ARE

Mommy spider: Damnit Lila…

Hawk’s favorite: sorry auntie nat xoxo

Antboy’s child: that's my girlfriend bitchesss

Other peter: my girlfriend is the baddest bitch in the universe and I love her.

Bitch: no one cares quill.

Antenna: i care

Bitch: fine, one person cares. 

Spider’s mom: stfu all of you. Especially you furface. 

Baby spider: hahaha listen to my mom.

Bell peppers: did I say something?

Mommy spider: yeah I'm kinda confused.

Baby spider: i- nvm

He froze: How many parent figure do you have?

Baby spider: 5, 6 if you count Dr. strange

Mr. Dr.: dont count me

Baby spider: ok 5.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abbie keener is my dream role as an actress. I love her, lol.


	8. Fury’s bitches part eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Betrayal everywhere

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry I diped for a week
> 
> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grayboy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pierto Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna; Abbie Keener to Yee Haw girl.

DAYS LATER BY THE WAY

CHAT 

Fury’s bitches

Mr. Dr.: WAIT- NO DONT ATTACK 

Other peter: what are you talking about

Mr. Dr.: TONY IS MAD I DON’T WANT TO BE PETER’S FATHER FIGURE.

Tony stank: YOU WILL DIE FOR THAT! HOW COULD YOU DENY BEING PETER’S FATHER FIGURE? HE SO PRECIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yee Haw girl: can y’all fight somewhere else???????

Yee Haw boy: for once in my life I agree with Abbie

Yee haw girl: rood

Retired: wait- whats going on

Mommy spider: Stark is mad at Strange for not accepting his role as Peter’s father figure

Retired: WHY

Spider’s mom: Thats a question I've asked since they day I moved in

Bitch: DO YOU GUYS HAVE CARROTS

Just drax: what?

Green Goddess: rocket why

Bitch: I FUCKING WANT CARROTS.

Hammer dude: kitchen, fridge, third drawer.

Queen of snek: good luck, I ate them all

Bitch: WHAT?

Baby spider: I just got out of school WHAT THE FUCK is going on?

Antboy’s child: you don’t use your phone during school?

Baby spider: no why would I?

Hawk’s favorite: lmao i do. 

Retired’s son: same

Meme queen: lol i don't go to school. 

Bitch: WHY DID YOU EAT ALL THE CARROTS, LOKI?

Queen of snek: cause… I wanted to. Got a problem with that?

Grayboy: its grapes all over again

Sabrina the teenage bitch: YOU FUCKING STARTED THAT RHODEY

Bitch: YES ITS A PROBLEM!

Grayboy: I know

Quick little bastard: it wass funay.

Retired: im actually going to disown you if you don’t spell correctly.

Meme queen: just get him a spelling book

Quick little bastard: I am 21 yeers old, I dontt neead a speeling book

Thor’s daddy: I need peace and quiet from you HEATHENS 

Cold solder: what now

Antboy’s child: we didn’t do shit

Thor’s daddy: NO FUCK THIS! They messed around with my lab!

Retired: specify which heathens Bruce

Thor’s daddy: the smart ones, so everyone besides Harley

Yee Haw boy: I did not come here to be attacked like this. And I was too there.

Tony stank: I’m missing something

Capsicle: welcome to the club

Thor’s daddy: It was Cassie, Shuri, Abbie, Peter, Harley, Lila, and cooper.

Tony stank: I hate how majority of those are my children

Retired: hahaha I have the good five

Tony stank: wanna bet on that?

Just drax: fight fight fight

Antenna: USE KNIVES 

Favorite stark: wait actually what’s happening 

Antboy’s mom: the great testosterone war.

Hawk’s favorite: hope is my favorite ant human

Antboy’s child: eye- y’know what that’s acceptable 

Hawk’s favorite: love uuuuuu

Antboy’s child: I love u too

Yee Haw boy: eww love

Baby spider: *gets depression*

Birdboy 2.0 has left the chat 

Baby spider: HOW 

Baby spider added Sam Wilson to the chat 

Baby spider renamed Sam Wilson to Bird Boy 2.0 

Baby spider: I wanna know how

Mommy spider: I helped

Spider’s mom: your not his mom anymore, nat

Baby spider: I feel betrayed

Queen of sneak: get used to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments give me life
> 
> Dm me! @holland.simpkins on insta


	9. Fury’s bitches part nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Twilight...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grape-boy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pierto Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch x2; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna; Abbie Keener to Yee Haw girl.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Insta: @holland.simpkins

CHAT

Fury’s Bitches

  
  


Baby spider renamed Grayboy to Grape-boy

Grape-boy: okay spiderboy…

Sabrina the teenage bitch: it fits

The first gay: yeah you fucking grape stealer.

Spider’s mom: get it val

Yee Haw boy: yes litteral queen slay. 

I am tree: i am groot

Bitch: wait change my name

Baby spider renamed Bitch to Bitch x2

Bitch x2: I didn't come here to be attacked.

Antboy: welcome to my fucking life

Antboy’s child: no one asked, dad.

Hawk’s favorite: damn…

Tony stank: peter did something....

Mama spider: what?

Tony stank: 1

Tony stank: 2

Tony stank: 3

Baby spider: uhh guys…

Yee Haw boy: tony is that your fucking super power.

Baby spider: i webbed myself to a tree.

Yee Haw girl: HOW

Retired: how are you texting?

Queen of snek: BANANA SUNDAE

Baby spider: Karen.. Yes peter? No! I ment send

Tony stank: what?

Hammer dude: excuse me?

Queen of snek: brother brother! Have you ever heard of the delicious treat, banana sundae

Hammer dude: yes…..

Queen of snek: it’s really good…. IT NEEDS WALNUTS

Yee Haw boy: we’re out

Sabrina the teenage bitch: not again.

Grape-boy: lmao…

Other peter: I broke the ship trying to fix it. 

Green goddess: why am i not surprised

Queen of snek: EXCUSE ME COUNTRY BOY?

Yee Haw boy: you saw my text

Bell peppers: WAIT STOP IM AT THE STORE, DON'T KILL MY SON

Baby spider: don’t kill my boyfriend

Yee Haw girl: don’t kill my brother 

Yee Haw boy: don’t even try to pretend you care. 

Tony stank: god not again no more sibling rivalry PLEASE

Queen of snek: I want my walnuts 

Bell peppers: otw 

Cold solder: FUUUUUCK ME

Bird boy 2.0: gladly

Mommy spider: I-

Capsicle: Sam really?

Bird boy 2.0: your worse with Natasha 

Meme queen: god have you seen my brother with Nakia???????

He froze: Don’t expose me

Meme queen: he speaks

He froze: stfu

Meme queen: make me 

Android: when I counted the sets of siblings I forgot this one. T’challa never speaks in this chat

Baby spider: I’m naming my daughter Renesmee. 

Yee Haw boy: we’re doing what now?

Antboy’s child: TWILIGHT 

Baby spider: YES

Yee Haw boy: babe what?

Mommy spider: Wait actually peter. Do that 

Baby spider: I am 

Quick little bastard: I love the twilight movies 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: your so gay

Quick little bastard: Bi*

Yee Haw boy: why are we naming our child Renesmee

Baby spider: became it’s beautiful.

Tony stank: uh no y’all are 17

Baby spider: piss off

Bell peppers: hey! Show your father some respect 

Mr. Dr.: wait I love twilight

Tony stank: of-fucking-course you do


	10. Fury's Bitches part ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter! I hope you enjoyed this ride! <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony Stark to Tony stank ; Pepper Potts Bell peppers; Peter Parker to Baby spider; Natasha Romanoff to Mommy spider; James Rhodes to Grape-boy; Steve Rogers to Capsicle; Bucky Barnes to Cold solder; Wanda Maximoff to Sabrina the teenage bitch; Thor to Hammer dude; Loki to Queen of snek; Bruce Banner to Thor's daddy; Scott Lang to Antboy; Hope Van Dyne to Antboy’s mom; Clint Barton to Retired, Shuri to Meme queen; T’challa to He froze; Stephen Strange to Mr. Dr. ; Sam Wilson to Bird boy 2.0; Vision to Android; Carol Danvers to Spider’s mom; Valkyrie to The first gay; Pierto Maximoff to Quick little bastard; Harley Keener is Yee Haw boy; lila barton is hawk's favorite; cooper barton is retired's son; cassie lang is antboy's child; Peter quill to Other peter; Gamora to Green goddess; Nebula to Favorite stark ; Groot to I am tree; rocket to Bitch x2; Drax the Destroyer to Just drax; Mantis to Antenna; Abbie Keener to Yee Haw girl.
> 
> ENJOY THE LAST CHAPTER!  
<3

CHAT

Fury’s Bitches 

Spider’s mom: add fury to this chat.

Baby spider added Nick Fury and Maria Hill to the chat. 

Baby spider renamed Nick Fury to Eyepatch and Maria Hill to Hates spiderboy

Hates spiderboy: I don’t hate you 

Eyepatch: you complain about him all the time Hill. Also, parker, kick me now

Spider’s mom: no

Eyepatch: fuck it’s you 

Tony stank: absolutely not.

Yee Haw boy: who’s eyepatch and hates spiderboy 

Retired: Nick Fury and Maria Hill

Spider’s mom: isn’t it just Fury 

Eyepatch: times change Danvers.

Yee Haw girl: fuck… 

Antboy’s child: mood what’s up 

Yee Haw girl: I failed the algebra test.

Yee Haw boy: lmao loser 

Baby spider added Lisa Keener to the chat 

Baby spider renamed Lisa Keener to Yee Haw mom

Yee Haw mom: Why 

Yee Haw girl: oh no...

Yee Haw mom: your grounded Abbie 

Yee Haw girl: PETE I’m suing you 

Yee Haw boy: hahahahaha serves you right 

Baby spider: haha loser

Tony stank: stop bullying Your sister. You guys only have 3

Favorite stark: what? I’m stark?

Bell peppers: look at your name!

Favorite stark: oh yeah... I am the favorite 

Tony stank: I’m still pissed that @nickfury is in this chat

Eyepatch: fight me kid

Tony stank: how about no

Just drax: fight fight fight 

Antenna: fight fight fight 

Other peter: why are you two so obsessed with fighting?

Just drax: it’s fun!

Antenna: especially with knives 

Bitch x2: I agree 

Capsicle: you guys need therapy 

Retired: so do you

Capsicle: never said I didn’t 

Hates spiderboy: Okay can I leave 

Hammer dude: no

Thor’s daddy: do you like the name of the chat Fury?

Eyepatch: no

Yee Haw boy: I fucking swear Pete stop 

Baby spider:  _ FUCK ME _

Tony stank: WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS I'm disowning you

Baby spider: as long as HARLEY FUCKS ME

Eyepatch: okay im done here, hill have you hacked the system yet?

Hates spiderboy: i cant, it isn't working

Baby spider: ha

Yee Haw mom: I’ve punished my child can I leave now?

Baby spider kicked Yee Haw mom from that chat

Mr. Dr.: Okay NOT FAIR!

Baby spider: get used to it pussyboy

Cold solder: here’s the thing about parker. He’s a dick. So is his boyfriend, so are friends

Antboy’s child: yo wtf did i do to you?

Bird boy 2.0: LISTEN PARKER IS A BITCH

He froze: we know this

Mr. Dr.: we know this

Antenna: he is kind

Bitch x2: no fuck him

Baby spider: i accept all of this

Mommy spider: stop attacking my son

Bell peppers: stop attacking my son

Spider’s mom:  ** stop attacking my son**

Tony stank: stop attacking my son

Yee Haw boy: stop attacking my boyfriend

Yee Haw girl: continue attacking him PLEASE

Antboy: what did my bug bro do to y’all

Cold solder: be a dick

Yee Haw girl: accurate.

Bell peppers: didn’t your mom ground you?

Yee Haw Girl: aren’t you also my mom?

Bell Peppers: THIS IS A TRAP THIS IS A TRAP THIS IS A TRAP!

Tony stank: RUN PEPPER

Queen of snek: thought this GC was dead not gonna lie… so…

Mr. Dr.: Why? It gets spammed in every single day. 

Hawk’s favorite: yeah by us!

Retired’s son: lol yeah…

The first gay: i think it’s time we delete this chat not gonna lie

Baby spider: NO FUCK NO

Antboy’s child: babe

Hawk’s favorite: yeah?

Antboy’s child: i wove u

Hawk’s favorite: i wove u more

Favorite stark: I'm too single

Queen of snek: MOOD

Retired’s son: wish i could say mood but i got a girlfriend today

Retired: no.. no no

Capsicle: Nat

Mommy spider: yess sir

I am tree: I AM GROOT

Bitch x2: Like Groot said. save it for the bedroom, guys

Quick little bastard: well fuck

Retired: what

Quick little bastard: i faailed the miidterm

Eyepatch: i see why

Baby spider added Laura Barton to the chat

Baby spider renamed Laura Barton to Barton mama

Barton mama: what… pietro why?

Quick little bastard: mom i studied i swear. 

Sabrina the teenage bitch: hahah no he didn’t 

Retired: did you?

Baby spider: i love causing chaos

Yee Haw girl: yeah we know

Tony stank: thats how this all started

Baby spider; mhm… okay.. Bye!

Baby spider left the chat

Mommy spider: wait… no one else can leave. Can we add him back?

Yee Haw boy added Peter Parker to the chat

Yee haw boy renamed Peter Parker to Bitch 2.0

Bitch 2.0: reasonable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you all for sticking with me this entire time! It's been amazing! I loved writing this and I loved reading y'alls comments. When you guys comment and like our stories it makes writing ten times better <3
> 
> So for one last time: Comments and kudos give me life!  
Insta: @holland.simpkins 
> 
> I LOVE YOU 3000


End file.
